Hello, world.

I snapped; I was intense, I picked fights, I argued and made sure I was heard, but of course that didn't last long. Oh well, time will tell if that's good or bad. I wish for a healthy balance though. Wishful thinking.

Casual romances are a blast, by the way.

I just want a Wallace to my Veronica right now.

(I'm re-watching Veronica Mars; I came to the conclusion that it's my favourite show ever, beating all others, right ahead of Arrested Development. I miss it the most, I'm sad that it got discontinued. Making myself feel better about this by reading fics - Veronica/Logan, Veronica/Lamb, Weevil/Lilly, Dick/Mac, general Cassidy - because as much as I love that sadistic bastard I don't know who to pair him up with. I'll try out some Cassidy/Veronica, for my own equally sadistic pleasure.)



PS. Italy was interesting. DEFINITELY changed me, for hm, worse? Depends how you look at it. Worse as in 'not approved by christianity'.

Ah, working. Something I never guessed I'd be good at, I mean - I always think I'm a ditz, I couldn't handle a job, and well, I surprise myself sometimes.

Worked for one day,  Saturday - just one day, I know - oh, but it was fifteen hours out in the hot, hot sun, without any shade and all. I had to handle kids, several kids at once. See, I worked at some kind of a fair, had to manage two games. Y'know, explain to kids how to play, help them, interact with them, make sure they're safe.

Basically my friend's reaction to me working there was "who the fuck was crazy enough to let YOU take care of KIDS, and SEVERAL of them?!".

I fully agreed with her. I used to hate kids so much and well, not like I love'em now but I kind of finally got that they have different personalities and shit, just like adults. So I can't dislike them all 'cause it'd be stupid.

Goddammit, some of the kids were so loveable. ♥ One became some kind of an assistant of mine, he was so adorable, kept helping me and talking to me, he told me his life story, haha - where he grew up, what time does he wake up at, small things like that. He even brought me the biggest ice cream he could find when he noticed I was feeling damn hot. Aww. Another - so young that he didn't talk yet - was shy at first but later kept leading me by my hand and not letting me go, wanted to play with me, ignored his dad when he begged him to leave me, haha, and brought me flowers all the time. Another aww. Another kid - I'd say he was seven years old - decided to draw me and he took so much care about making the picture detailed as much as possible, he even asked around for my name behind my back, haha. I kept his picture! I have it at home!

A few kids were so unbearable though, ugh.

Overall I was TIRED AS FUCK after work - I was home at 11PM! I thought I'd overheat there but I managed. Jesus, I never suspected that it would be so damn hard.

Surprisingly, I had fun, y'know? Great experience. I'd do it again.

And I got paid well, so. ♥

Best thing is that nowadays when I'm out somewhere the parents of the kids recognize me. Like today, some guy give me a big, big smile when I was passing him - I knew he looked familiar! After some time I finally remembered that he was with his son at the fair, I even talked to him briefly.

Oh, and I'm going to Italy in just 20 days. Trying to make as much as possible out of it. ♥

Aaand - I adore Martina Topley-Bird. Sandpaper Kisses and Ilya and oh, the whole two CDs are amazing!



On a side, unrelated note...
I miss some people for the wrong reasons.

I'd love to have a way to let my emotions flow out of me. I mean, every emotion other than blind happiness.

I'm just so unbelievably fucking frustrated, oh.

I have flashes of anger and supposedly I'm surprisingly terrifying then - but that happens only around certain people and it's rare;  whenever I'm sad, I cover it up - unconsciously, even; whenever I'm sexually frustrated I laugh pathetically, hands shaking - even though I feel like emitting a wild cat's roar; whenever I'm scared, I laugh nervously, feeling an uncomfortable squeeze around my heart. That's it.

So I kind of feel like a robot. One-track action, yes, just giggle, laugh, smile, be cute, oh fucking whatever. I can't even break out of this vicious cycle, ha! It's become my natural reaction now. Even if I try not to, I laugh.

I laugh in someone's face if I insult them.

I laugh at myself when I look in the mirror and see myself, miserable.

I laugh at funerals, like a madwoman - cry, laugh, repeat.

I'm just precious like that.

I want a dog.

Or a cat.

I miss that feeling of closeness and trust and care and unconditional love (from both sides, mind you).

So, so fucking much.








I miss my Ares so much after reading this and later people's stories about their/their close ones love for their animals.

I don't really want to talk about anything related to my last entry, mmkay? So, meme (FORCED TO DO) to loosen up the atmosphere here.


( Pointless. )

Got to finally post something that makes sense here! And comment on friends' journals. I'm talking about you, Rimon (ILY SO FUCKING MUCH ♥) and Ariel (LONG TIME NO TALK).

This guy I know, he died in a car crash on the tenth of February.

Yesterday before maths I got a call from my friend, and she couldn't stop crying when she told me.

I think I stared at my phone for a while.

You just can't believe it if it comes so suddenly. Shock.

I had a math test after that and my hands were shaking so much when I was writing, but I stayed. I thought that using his death as an excuse for that would be low, even though  my friend told me to go home. After the lesson I went home, though. Then met up with others. We walked around in silence.

Staring at him today, when he was in an open casket wasn't that horrible, even though it was pretty clear that they had to... 'fix up' half of his face because it got--- well, destroyed in the crash. The worst was the atmosphere, his parents, classmates, friends with bloodshot eyes, someone breaking up and crying every few minutes, the flowers everywhere, shit. I entered the room with the casket only once, I just couldn't go there again later, because of--- everything.

And of 'course the pale, deathly pale face of his usually cheerful best friend, and the constant wailing of another. She cried, cried, cried, then was silent for a few minutes trying to comfort someone else, then cried again, repeat.

Of 'course I tried comforting her, several times, but I just didn't know what to say. Especially when she kept asking 'why?' and saying that he'd want us to be happy, not sad...

I tried to keep my face straight, really, but I couldn't. I hate crying in front of others, but what could I do? The atmosphere got to me, hard. I didn't really feel it for the most of the time, but my friend told me that I'm shaking a lot, and I noticed it when I had my second coffee - it almost fell from my hand.

I couldn't keep a straight face when I saw others crying so hard.

Our friend delivered the black humor ("well, finally everyone from our pack met up! We just chose an awful place, no?"), and even though we wanted to say 'stop', we laughed. 'Cause that's what you do. That's how you handle it.

Irony? He'll be buried on Valentine's Day. We'll bring flowers to the person we loved, no?

Honestly, it's not like I was his best friend or something, but I knew him for months now, partied with him a few good times. Enough to be sad now.

We still don't know what exactly happened there.

It was so horrible, when I embraced a few friends and they were crying into my shoulder, and when I tried to hold back my own tears but I couldn't, Jesus, and I stared hopelessly into the sky or someone else's eyes not knowing what to do, what to say, so I just stood there and stared straight ahead, blurry vision and all. And I noticed just now that my left palm is covered with red half-moon bruises, because I pressed my nails so hard against my hand when I was sitting next to someone who was crying so hard.

I'm seriously, seriously surprised that it hit me so hard.

I guess it's because it's the first time someone who wasn't my family and certainly wasn't old died. He was just seventeen.

Thanks to this I saw a side of my parents I never wanted to see. They completely didn't care about it, they didn't understand why I was sad and angry, they said there was no reason for me to not go to school that day, that I apparently should go and sit in class shaking. And not go today to bring flowers, say something to his family, mourn, say my goodbyes. And what, sit in class while he'll be buried? My uncle was the worst, though, when he not-so-subtly suggested that Tom was 'driving under influence then, for sure!'. And he made fun of it while I stood there staring at him. Fuck you, i wanted to say so much.

And when my dad said that he wouldn't go 'cause he doesn't care about friends, that's why he doesn't have them, because they're all bastards and etcetera, he started insulting and insulting.

I never knew my family was so fucking insensitive.

I think spelling to them that 'someone I knew just suddenly DIED, you stupid fucks' wouldn't work.

Shows how much my mom cares about me, when she saw that I'm silent the whole day and in an awful mood, and all she could do was complain and whine to my dad about 'my behavior'. That I'm acting like a bitch, why am I so angry, why am I snapping at them, why did I close myself in my room. That I have completely no reason to. Yes, I know death happens, but... fuck.

I wonder if they would be happy if everyone didn't even care if they died.

Life goes on, I know, but just let me feel awful for some time, please.

I haven't seen the second season of Heroes - I mean, I've seen a few episodes but I don't know, I lost interest? I still love Nathan, though. and Petrellicest of 'course.

I've found my old Petrellicest drabble-things I wrote waaay back--- oh, I don't even remember when but it was a long time ago. I've gotten a bit nostalgic when I saw them and well, I'll just post them here, yanno? Sorry it's capitalization-less.




wish - a lone star shoots through the sky and peter closes his eyes; he imagines that it's not a star but something-- someone else riding the night skyline.

need - i'm so sorry, peter overhears the doctor telling his mother, and even though her strangled cry breaks his heart into little pieces, right now - inhaling and exhaling in short, raspy breaths - his mind, body, soul and just fingers seek for the strong, confident and protecting hand of his beloved brother.

dream - his yawn is cut short as he starts blinking confusedly; even though he can see that it's Heidi curled up against his chest, he could swear he just looked not into his wife's metallic blue eyes but into a pair of warm coco brown ones.

search - nathan had moments when he simply hated his life, especially when instead of hanging out with his friends when he was twelve he had to study under his father's watchful eyes. he never really was a child, so when a new one came to his family, a little baby boy, he couldn't help but be envious. a few short years later though he understood that he found his childhood here, with peter, the biggest gift of all, living out the things nathan couldn't have and sharing them with him; those thoughs flied through nathan's mind as he pushed the swing, smiling with his heart beating faster in his chest.

destroy - he ran as fast as speedy gonzales, speed of light on his frail, thin legs. tripping on a rock blurred out of his vision by frantic tears he felt a shoe connect with his rib. he almost reached the doors this time, almost, but safety is always too far away. he heard and felt something drop heavily on the pavement - an army bag - and looking up he saw a figure of a man, comfortingly familiar, dressed in a beautifully cut uniform, rage just reaching his eyes. peter smiled tearfully. he's back. home reached him this time.

fly - nathan knew this flying thing would become a problem, especially when peter got high - both literally and figuratively. he pondered if he should call the firefighters when peter got stuck between branches of an old oak tree, yelping and whining like a very vocal kicked kitten.

swim - he had the luck to see nathan flying around just in his underwear today, rushing to get ready to leave. peter sat transfixed in his chair, gaze following the man around like he was watching a tennis game, taking in the lean, rippling muscles, still untouched by aging. he fidgeted in his seat, beginning to feel ashamedly hot around his collar, when nate's eyes snapped to his, catching him red-handed. suddenly the air was as thick as water and just swallowing felt like drowning.

freeze - sometimes nathan wishes that he could stop time when peter was the cute as a button two years old, joyful six years old, or the adventurous eleven years old, not the jaded twenty-seven years old that he is now

jump - nathan told him that you've got to reach your goals one step at a time, so now peter was smiling cheerfully while rubbing his sore feet, after a few hours of using a pogo stick without a minute of rest; he was determined, he's sure he will soar through the skies one day.

run - peter rolled his eyes as he fumbled with the shoelaces of his both shoes sneakily tied together; he's never going to invite nate to play tag with him, never again!

mother -  nathan guessed it was understandable and very right that after his mother said that 'she knew all along' his breath got painfully caught in his throat, but very, very wrong that after she clarified that she meant their powers he sighed happily.

father - he loved his father, he really did. he just loved nathan, his mom, heidi, his nannies, his flat, the fridge, his new converse shoes, his toothbrush, orbit gum and his neighbors' iguana much more.

brother - all those couples, they barked out empty words about how they're 'connected by soul, mind, heart'... but which one could say that they were actually connected by something, by blood?

sister - do you know the feeling when you know you have to shoot a photo but you don't have your camera with you? peter knew it all to well, especially the day after nathan's bachelor party, when was woken up by a completely drunk nate, smeared lipstick sloppily painted on his mouth, a dress ripping off his broad shoulders with every small move he made.



I've also written about three complete fics - one is dream-like, confusing and I don't think I handled it well, the second one is a long-ish comedy one, the third is Heidi-centric about her life. They probably won't be posted, because I--- well, I have issues with them.


By the way, Cat Power has some amazing songs. Lived in Bars, Hate, Cross Bones Style, Ice Water--- they're incredible.


Completely unrelated IRL note - I quite like my social life lately. I meet up with different people, not those I see every time when I go out. T'was awkward at times but hell, making new friends is never a bad thing, no? Like today I completely accidentally met up and spent several hours with this girl I meet with basically only when we're going out in a wider group of friends, and her classmate who I know briefly (who is just so fucking adorable, she's such a doll). It was fun! And tomorrow I'm going to help find fitting jeans for this guy, I also met up with him and his girlfriend once, and with them and their group of friends too.

The only downside of this? I don't have time to meet up/talk with my older friends. Which kind of sucks, to be honest, I'll have to work out some time for her, seriously. Yeah, I'm talking about just one person now. Sorry Arleen, I hope I'll find some time for you soon, love. D;

I was standing at a bus stop today.

I still had about five minutes until the bus arrived, so I decided to look around. I turned towards this not-even-close-to-thick park and watched. Behind it there was a road, many lights, cars passing in the distance, buildings and whatnot. Some paths going through it, a few people lazily walking around, old ladies carrying heavy bags, they probably went shopping, I have no idea. I don't remember the time exactly - something around half past four PM, I think, so it was slowly getting dark.

Basically, I don't really like winter, but at that moment I was slightly... overwhelmed, for a lack of a better word. The fact that the cold snow from the ground was biting into my shoe-protected toes, that chill was hanging in the air, that wind was blowing my hair into my face every moment stopped bothering me then. I just forgot about it for a minute.

Oh, how I enjoyed the view. I seriously tried to list every color that could combine into what I saw then. I remember... dust pink, some dull brown, with a dash of gray and pale yellow from street and car lights. It looked incredibly retro. Dusk was sepia inspired, and I mean that.

I wouldn't be surprised if I saw a horse there, or an elegantly dressed lady with a gentleman in a carriage. Oh, and baroque streetlights, don't ask.

I was looking back at all of it even when I was stepping into that damn bus, and I considered staying there and waiting there for the next one.

I never really appreciated that color--- what color was it, anyway? That combination.




1) Oh, Harry Potter fanfiction. What could I do without you, love? I still can't survive without it, specifically without m'dear Draco/Hermione. I'm still so pathetic. And bitter, bitter (true to my nickname! Mae means... yes.), BITTER over the damned epilogue.

Psh.

Anyway, yesterday I read: "The Ladder", by Cheryl Dyson (kind of OOC but good porn, and the ladder...), "Scrabble", by Melissa D (I was impressed, loved it), "Showered", by RoseWithThorns (very nice porn if you're picturing it in your head) and "Perfect Prefect", by Geena (top and controlling Hermione + whimpering Draco is so good sometimes).

Overall - got my daily fix.

Still bitter, though (I'm a spoiled kid when it comes to my precious OTP of all OTPs!).



2) arleen_05 is trying to make me like James Potter. Buh... I've never really warmed up to him. I got so much douchevibes from him that I didn't want to touch him with a ten foot pole, really, I read fics where he was in a smaller role or something, and that was it. Or some pointledd crack!porn. I've never had a fixed-in-my-mind relationship for him, nor did I really care if he was with Lily or not (although, after writing this one fic in Polish - don't ask - I think I began liking her, to the point that I would read Severus/Lily if someone recced me a good one).

She likes Sirius/James, I'm not really keen on that ship. So, just for her, I'm trying to fix someone up with James in my mind. That always helps me like a character, ha. I read a great fic of them, or just a good PWP and there's a damn bigger chance I'll the the character.

So, available pairings? Hm. I specifically went to Fictionalley for this (SCUSA! \! I used to post there! Guess which ship thread, lmao):

Het - James/Bellatrix, James/Narcissa.
Slash - James/Lucius, James/Regulus.

UUUGH. James/Narcissa intrigues me as fuck but I love the canon Lucius/Narcissa. I love them together! So I'd be most happy reading a fic where James is a one-time thing and she goes back to Lucius... so both J/N and J/L go dooown the drain.

Bellatrix is too lesbian for that (hahaha), so no J/B either.

Regulus... I guess I couldn't read that, too. Just doesn't seem right! I like Remus/Regulus, pre-Sirius/Remus. Agh.

I think I prefer James with girls. Quick, his generation females! Hmm.

Lily, Bellatrix, Narcissa... er, that's it.

Fuck, I'm going to have a problem with this guy, alright.


3) I noticed a fun thing - I love D/Hr muchmuch, yes? When I watch other shows/read other books/etc, I tend to pair up characters reminding me of them, both personality and appearance-wise. Hmm.

Like, for example - I was surfing channels the other day and I stopped on Zoey 101. I watched a few minutes; there was this arrogant, blond guy there, who went all pissy at this nerdy girl. Guess my reaction.

Lmao. Sawyer/Kate from Lost? Hello? Veronica/Logan? By stretch, Weevil/Lilly? Veronica/Lamb? Severus/Lily? Haa.

Oh, sleep. I have an awful lot of dreams lately, a few every night, even if I go to sleep for only a hour or two, really! I wake up with a head full of colors...

There's no symmetry in heterosexual relationships.

It fucking bothers me for some reason.












(I hate myself lately.)

You know what I want to do? Go somewhere.

As simple as that, really! I have no idea why but my surroundings lately became so completely and utterly boring, even most of the people I know, geez. Maybe I'm thinking like a little spoiled kid but man, I thought they'd be more impulsive than they are. Meh, I'm basically speaking just about one person now, oh-so-cleverly hiding it under the word 'we'.

Why the fuck did I even write 'we' when I came clean about it like a sentence later?

Palm, forehead, slap Mae, yeah. I went though this routine several times this week.

Tangent (I had to dictionary.com this word, I had no idea if I'm using it well; oh, the things you learn by reading the Wiki page of QI episodes!): I'm usually quite full of myself when it comes to 'I'm-smarter-that-you-anyway!', sad but true - oh, only children - but lately I feel like an idiot. Idjit, even. I love that word. Er, after almost everything I say I'm all, "what? You dumbass", seriously. I don't know if it's the uneducated kind of idiot, or the damn goldfish memory kind of idiot, probably both.

(Goldfishes don't have bad memory, by the way! No animals were ever said to have bad memory! Thanks, QI!)

Back to the subject - lately I'm all, "oh, fuck this", I want to take some cash, some absolutely necessary things (CKM. You've got to have Sonnet's tits everywhere you go), someone worthy, aaaand jump on some train somewhere. Be back after the weekend, y'know. Go to one city or a few cities or whatnot... anywhere remotely big or interesting.

Actually the possibility of doing it - in percentage, to be nifty and full of bullshit! - got up by 69% (it was just an excuse to use this number, really, don't read too much into it), because I think I can check off the 'someone worthy'. Cash also, damn, Christmas = cash from family, yes! Now just to find some time, good weather, or just wait till summer.

Fuck winter.

Now, it's Christmas soon. My parents know how I love it.

Spit, spit, spit. I hate it.

I mean, festive, pretty, lights, beautiful! I kind of love it but the fact that I have to go to family gatherings then, those things, they make me go mad. Just give me gifts/cash and leave my alone, kthxbai. My preferred course of action.

Oh, how much I'd want to just run away on Christmas. I'm serious. Wake up on that damn day, grab someone, a bag, some cash and go to another city, away from my family and the gatherings and the lies and bullshit and fake smiles and bitching and whining and BREATHE.

Either walk around along a snowy path in some faraway city, or the main street with all those marvelous lights and festive shop windows, or rent a room and chill with a simple small cake and smile on your face, a honest one, planted there thanks to the euphoria or getting away...

Or just get drunk and run around singing Christmas carols at the top of your lungs, blessing some random city with your screeching voice.

I really don't feel like going around my family and 'celebrating'. I have nothing to celebrate, man. I'm stressed out. I'm undecided about things. I don't feel good about myself. Right now.

I want an adventure.

Or at least a new MP3/MP4 player, that'd be quite good too, thank you.

To wrap this up (ha! Gifts! Wrapping up! Like gifts, geddit? Er---), the most polish thing ever on this journal, inspired by m'dear arleen_05 - no, goddammit! Arleen. She's not just an LJ name to me. I know her very well personally, that blue LJ-username looks so cold and impersonal, dang... I snagged a meme from her and, well, it's basically just for her to fill out (revenge!). Who else reading this knows my native language?

( Szprechen ju POLISH? )

Fin.

Haven't been updating LJ, not commenting friends' journals, etc. Reason: not much vacations left, spending computer time only to watch Veronica Mars, and it's going slowly because I'm out for the whole day/night/a few days all the time.

Anyway. You know how sometimes, when thinking about a character, you come up with a detail like that he prefers boxers than briefs, or she always eats red M&M's first, and it becomes canon in your mind?




I firmly believe that Nathan Petrelli, even though always tries to listen to classical music in his office or in front of other people, when he's alone he always listens to Neko Case. She's his favourite. I can see him driving alone out of the city, a lonely road, it's very hot, his jacket is off, a few buttons of his shirt opened, and he's blasting Neko Case.

Songs like "Set Out Running", "Somebody Led Me Away", "South Tacoma Way"... downloadable.

Yes, I'm just spreading the Neko Case love.

She needs to record a new album ASAP or I'll die soon.

I've had an interesting dream yesterday. It's... making me feel strange inside. Uneasy? I don't know. I just feel it has a deeper meaning that I need to discover. I've been trying to figure it out now - my dreams almost always hold a deeper meaning, some message from my subconscious. I'm serious, I've analyzed my past dreams and I took so much out of them! It was all true, they showed me what I couldn't figure out about myself, what I wanted but was in denial... I respect dreams.

( Anyway, my dream (I love dreamposts, LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!): )

I totes didn't plan an entry as long as this lul.

I always get carried off when ranting about real life things, hahaa.

Anyway, the song I'm listening to now, Neko Case - "South Tacoma Way", every time I sing along or just mouth the lyrics, I weep at the end! Such a fucking emotional song. D;

Oh, Neko. I love you so much. Music I RECOMMEND, RECOMMEND, RECOMMEND! One of the best artists ever.

About the Deathly Hallows spoilers, ain't going to write them here, no worries, just... I SURE HOPE THEY AREN'T REAL.

IT'S WORSE THAN MOST FANFICS I'VE READ, I MEAN THE ENDING, WTF.

Have mercy, Rowling.

You know what I love? That I've been reminded of my massive love for Draco/Hermione. I kind of read almost only Petrellicest and such lately. Not that I forgot that I'm Dramione-obsessed, mind you.

It's just that now it's like I've fallen in love in that pairing once again. Maybe the 100000000th time now. C:

Draco/Hermione = OTP of all OTPs for life, yo.

Therefore now my temporary home is The Ferveo Project, especially their Butterbeer and Merlin fic list. <3

Contemplating re-reading the fandom classics, like "We'll Always Have Paris" or "Draco Malfoy the Amazing Bouncing... Rat?", which is actually the FIRST EVER fanfic I've read, of any fandom and pairing. This got me into fanfiction overall! It's amazing, so amazing!

Also, meed to re-read "Happy Hour", "Their Room", "Divine Humiliation", and of 'course "Pineapple, Yum! Or Oh, Coconut!", which... OH MY GOD. THERE'S A NEW CHAPTER?!

AFTER 2 YEARS, LIFESAVERKAT UPDATED THE FANDOM CLASSIC CRACKFIC "PINEAPPLE, YUM! OR OH, COCONUT!"?

I'M RE-READING THIS, NOW.

SCREW Y'ALL, I'M SO HAPPY.

I love my fandom. So much it hurts.

HAY aliasagent!

HAPPY (late) BIRTHDAY! And such.

I'm sorry it's so late. D: Quite busy + been out of town/partying most of the time = very little computer/LJ time.

Anyway, proceeding to the journal note...

As I was saying, yay partying. :3 Since the last LJ note I've been to... two? Three? parties (is it bad that I don't exactly remember? Durr), having so much fun. The last party was exceptional, sesese. Left Monday, at 7PM, got back Tuesday, at 4PM. It was outside my city, maybe 25 - 30 minutes by car. 13 people there, as I remember. There was a house where we were partying, but for the most of the time we were outside - a big yard, with an inflatable pool (:D), a swing-bench thing for three people with a small treehouse thing next to it, a lot of place to set up a fire, to run around and get wet from the sprinkles... and a porch in the front of the house, and a much bigger one in the back, with a table normally for 10 people but y'know, somehow everyone could sit by and everyone had place. :D

That + night + alcohol = damn fun.

I didn't even get drunk, kekeke. Me, my boyfriend and this one girl were the only ones that stayed sober/more half-sober I'd say, honestly. We just watched the mayhem around and it was so much olol. My best friend got drunk for the first time ever and I was there to help her, hah, so she was alright. Not that anything could happen to her or anyone would do something, the thing about the company I've had is that those are people who partied with eachother for many times now. They kind of take care of eachother even when they're all drunk, and it's a thing very fun to watch.

I never even had time to sleep. My boyfriend and I had a tent in the backyard, and not only we were too awake to sleep, had too much lol listening to the crack conversations going on at the porch, but at one point three guys tackled our tent, jumping on it from three sides and tearing it apart. Yeah. Overall, couldn't stop laughing. xD

Came back home and slept for 18 hours straight.

Waiting for the next party there/like that. Can't. Wait. :D

So I've seen the post about your Dad liking Life on Mars, aliasagent. I had an insomnia attack last night (AGAIN, IMMA DYIN I NEEDS SLEEP NAO), so after reading that post I though what the heck, I have nothing better to do, I'll watch the first episode. Maybe I'll get your John Simm obsession (WHICH I TOTES SHOULD UNDERSTAND -> SEE: MAE & THE PASDAR FOR EXAMPLE. <3333333333333333333333333).

Anyway, I'll be honest here: I enjoyed the first episode, although I didn't think it was that mega-amazing. I mean, I loved the plot and thought it was fantastic, but I kind of didn't notice the rest. The moment where Sam 'woke up' in the past, the whole montage seemed a little too long for me, although I totally loved that David Bowie's (<333) "Life on Mars" was playing on Sam's iPod (I didn't even realize that the show's named after that song then, ahaah). I didn't fall in love in Sam, but I so felt sympathy for him when he was crying in his car - damn.

So, after watching it I felt it was cool, but not as amazing as, for example, Doctor Who.

Fast forward to today.

I'm heading to my grandma's, thinking random things. I catch myself thinking about Life on Mars. Not one time, a few good times, contemplating the characters, plot, where the story's heading, things that can happen in the next episodes...

And I got it, and suddenly it hit me that I loved the first episode. Not in that OMGSAMAZINGZING way, but in a 'goddamn-I-appreciate-the-wonderful-writing-and-acting' way. Seriously, it was great, plot and all. Suddenly the scenes stopped being 'long', but 'artistic and beautiful, worth watching, full of meaning'... I just had to wait off some time to 'get' it, yanno? I just don't watch 'seriouser' shows that much, not used to it.

But I think I'll need transcripts for next episodes, because I mostly didn't understand Annie, haha. Too strong accent for my poor little Polish mind to wrap around. D:

So, overall, fantastic show and I'm seriously looking forward to the next episode. It ain't the type of show to OJE0YR40898FANGIRLFANGIRL over like Heroes or Doctor Who, it's more... I don't know. It's something I feel like I should take seriously because it's a promise of mind-blowing, original things.

I love British TV. No unnecessary fillers like in US shows. They're more original and unconventional. They're not afraid that much to show what they want, I think, and not in a cheap way. They know how to do it.

Also seen Torchwood episode one, but I'll have to write another note about that, haha~

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY FUCKING GOD

I'm crying and I've JUST SEEN THE DOCTOR WHO SEASON 1 FINALE.

ECCLESCAKE ;_; I'LL MISS MY ECCLESCAKE!

ASKDJARF; ROSE IN THAT EPISODE = FANTASTIC

JACK = AWESOME

N8OEYG40BHY';UP94-

DAVID TENNANT TIME NOW! BUT I'LL STILL MISS MY ECCLESCAKE!

ANYWAY, OFF TO WATCH S2 AT LEAST ONE EPISODE, IT'S ALMOST 1AM HERE BUT WHOTHEFUCKCARES, I NEED MORE ;______________________________________________________________________;

MORE IN-DEPTH REVIEW AND THINGS WHEN I COOL DOWN RIOE3Y5G9U3JHGL4YH;'937-

I've just seen the first episode.

*afterglow*

IT WAS AWESOME. OH MY GOD. I FEEL LIKE WRITING IN CAPS. AWESOME. CHRISTOPHER ECCLESTON AS THE DOCTOR? AWESOME. ROSE? AWESOME. DIALOGUE? AWESOME.

Better than Traveler, haha!

I MEAN, THE DIALOGUE. LOLLOLOLO. I need a transcript to understand all of it but what I've understood, AWESOME. The Doctor was AWESOME.

AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME.

Hand-in-hand running and the offer to take her with him and ooooh, Doctor/Rose. <3 They're so awesome together. Awesome awesome awesome.

That London Eye conversation got me lolling so hard, 'what? what? what do you mean?... oh. FANTASTIC." And Jackie trying to seduce the Doctor. And the whole episode got me smiling. A lot.

I'm in love. *_*

I seriously should hate you aliasagent for making me watch and do all those things, first Traveler, now Doctor Who AND THESE ICONS WTF.

( Holy shit, the source picture = amazing. I WANT TO BE THE MUG. )

Kill me now plx. *LOADING THE FIRST EPISODE OF DR WHO* FUUUUCK YOU WORLD. I'm going to bend time and have some more of it to watch this and that, Jesus.

Screw that I'm going to a wedding tomorrow and I need sleep and such! ;D

I watched Traveler, four episodes! Still need to see the fifth.

Episode two (I wrote this in notepad while watching the episode):

Oh, the flashback. It looks like Tyler needs a friend really, really much. ;_; He needs Jay lul (I NEED TRAVELER FANFICTION! PORN PORN PORN).

The car chase scene - oh, so Tyler has a brother? Nice. Anyway, the guy's pretty impulsive. And cocky. Aggggh reminds me of my favourite boy (see icon <333333333)... OH THEY CRASHED.

;_; They were framed better than Lincoln from Prison Break.

I don't know if I should trust Tyler's father. There's something off with him.

Polygraph thing - I like Jay's girlfriend! Jay reminds me of Sam though, that's not good.

Rest of the episodes:

Tyler's ex's looking like a slut to me. Unlikeable character? Ionno. I prefer Kim.

Jay continues to be a little bitch BUT he's bearable and likeable here and there. So I don't really mind him that much (not like Sam askdjarf; ANNOYING).

;_; Tyler's hot. Massive lololo after I've seen Logan Marshall-Green as Trey Atwood yesterday. In prison, all beat up... I lolled so hard. "OHOHOH THAT'S TYLER FOG! TYLER FOG IN PRISON! GUANTANAMO BAY! THEY CAUGHT THEM... wrong show, er."

On the TV show guys hotness he ranks the same as Michael Urie (Marc St. James! Although ionno, I love Marky. <3333333333333 More than Tyler, for now)). Still, not as hot as Dean Winchester or ESPECIALLY my Nathan. Adrian Pasdar wohoo. <3

DID JAY CALL TYLER "TY...?" THERE? DID HE? Ohmygod TYLER/JAY TRAVELER OTP STFU. I adore the name Ty, it's pronounced like Tae which is one of my character's name yei!

SRSLY GUISE DOES TYLER/JAY FANFICTION EXIST?

Will, oh Will. Still don't know if I like him. For now, not that much. He was all cool in the pool scene but meh. Other than that, still neutral. Do something Will!

I *love* it that Anthony Michael Ruivivar has a role here. Yay Third Watch! Can't stop seeing him as Carlos though.

Overall, Traveler... I wasn't that convinced (still ain't) to it, I don't know if I dig the plot, buuuu~~~t it's getting better, I'll tell you that. It got better in the end of the third episode. Before it I was all 'meh, good' but now I'm all thinky and curious...

Who the hell is Will Traveler?

To finish this Traveler pseudo-rant I just want to say that I almost came when I saw that scene where Tyler's making out with his ex, against the bookshelf and all, I didn't even notice the chick, just him and yay. *_* Looks like he's a good kisser!




By the way, it was the end of the schoolyear on Friday. YEEEEAH VACATIONS. Got back home and had a tequila shot, haha. PAAARRRRTYYYY TIIIIME. And OH I NEED TO MAKE A PHOTO POST. I'M A SHOPAHOLIC.

CLOTHES CLOTHES CLOTHES BOUGHT SO MANY AND OMG YAY CLOTHES!

Ever had that thing where when you listen to some song it instantly reminds you of something, sometimes for no real reason? Or because of the lyrics and all? Y'know, people make fanmixes this way, finding songs reminding them of something. I ain't doing a fanmix (for now?), but I want to type down some Heroesy-songs here.

( Songs reminding me of Petrellicest... )




( Overall Heroes< songs... )




This was a fun post. For me. Hahh~~~ I can post those songs?